Internal Crisis at Christmas

It's hard to put a value on the moments in my heart...
...the pieces will stay with me, thought the feelings, they may not...
...It's hard to get a feeling when I'm living what I'm reflecting...
...but, it's that time of year, when every second is a memory...

I'm celebrating this Christmas in purgatory...
...every celebration is eternal, but inside, it's not the same...
I'm celebrating this Christmas in purgatory...
...where you'd think warmth is ok, 'til your unwrapping presents in the rain...
Sharing blessings with a ghost, semi-acquaintances matter most...
...when you're celebrating Christmas in purgatory...

How did I get here?
...when did it start?...
Did it happen in an instant or did the tortoise play a part?
It's hard to get excited, when you've known it from the start...
...the reason you're in purgatory...
...is because you never shared your heart...

I opened all my presents, not a single one stood out...
...just a dress shirt and some tube socks...
...neither of which will ever fit...
I stare into the darkness...
...rather, the never ending fog...
...and ask for Santa, one last wish...
...which will come through in the morning...

I'm no longer there in Sullentown...
...the afternoon mist no longer hovers over all...
My wish came true late Christmas night...
...and I find myself a month before...
...with a chance to let my true feelings show...

...and to let my Christmas miracle know...